My body may be young, but my soul is very old
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um my name is everywhere
but i'm just some guy

something i forgot about this weekend
when talking about elvis, and poop, and watersports
we discovered the location of the human soul
it's at the top of your colon
and when you die
your muscles relax
and that last big... um.... release happens
that's when your sould is free!
matt thought i should travel back in time
explain that to the aztecs

- Monday, June 15, 1998 at 10:32:18 (EDT)
oh my gosh
am i still alive???
last night; what madness was found
bn had gone back to work friday night
i had nothing planned but maybe going to play poker w/ Matt ;& Sarah
their friends all were broke and could not spare ten bucks
so they scratched that idea
mentioned the possibility of a midnight showing of the film the professional
not real exciting night, or so it seemed at the time
out of the blue bn popped up
he had not worked that day
cuz he loves his grandma and had gone to Cville to be at a family dinner she hosted
brought some bitchin brownies w/ him too!
around this time i figured if i was going to be clean and shaven for the film i better get my move on
sometime during my ritual the phone rang
the bn got it and talked to sarah for the first time, something about a change of plans
they would be arriving ASAP
but there is not much chance of me getting clean quicker than usual
it just does not happen
as i was pulling on my boxers i heard her laugh
then bn talking
then matt
eventually i made my entrance
they were ready for a road trip
the desire to gamble had won out
"let's go to Atlantic City"
"it's only a 5 hour drive"
bn did not feel like going at first
but i was not going to go without him
i don't leave my friends out of adventures like that
when fun is to be had and they are already there
all four of us piled into my car
a ton of CDs in tow
a quick stop by an ATM
and we were on our way
the drive was a blast
good conversation all around
highlights including:
the connection between the old dominion and depends under garments
Matt likes candy
bn does not like to ride shotgun when i drive
the potomic river smells like hell
driving by non specific cities
where you can find places called store
that sell cans labeled food
i determined that i do indeed have carpal tunnel, and it hurts like hell
all roads in jersey were design by someone from roanoke
as i try to remeber there is a big blur
a great deal of laughing
and quick wit
then the city
bn reflected on his recent trip to vegas
park the car and head for the floor
the gurls head for the slots
i follow matt to the tables
black jack is his game
i watch him lose 30 bucks
he walks away, and allows me to sight see
the people
so desperate
spending money they obviously do not have to spare
in the very center of my being i began to feel this pain
i wanted to wretch
could not take it
so we headed out for the boardwalk
endind up walking the beach
since i am from a beach town the appeal of this was slightly lost on me
a time for me to be isolated and introspective
matt and bn were bonding
sarah was being in touch with her inner child
cute as hell, but not where i was at all
seashells loose there appeal when you grow up around them
i still found a pretty one
a small piece of a broken conch
dull boring white on the outside
scratched and cracked
but flip it over
to what should be the inside
and you find all the colors of a perfect sunset with a high gloss finish
it made me even more introspective
pretty soon we got hungry
i wanted to see the other places
surf the casinos
so we combined a search for food with testing the slots
i lost a great deal
won nothing
give give give - get nothing in return
bn found a 20 foot woman
and promptly felt her up
after finding that it costs 8 dollars for a bagel everywhere down there we packed it in and left
driving away from the the city
eventually i found a little diner
a place to have some northern redneck cookin
kountry style, with a k
we grubbed up
headed out again
they slept, i drove
i suppose i made it home
i woke up in my bed an hour ago
i remember the time

- Sunday, June 14, 1998 at 19:40:47 (EDT)
star wars references are always pleasant to read

i had major brain function a few hours ago
but it has passed now
i read the gus musings
was kinda strange to be able to picture the places he refered to
Bn played at the Budha Biker Bar when i went up there w/ him
i'm entertaining the idea of going up there tomorrow during the day
if not to new york
i dunno
the irritations of coworkers are bringing me down
power struggles and things like that
i get screwed in the process
oh well
have to remind myself that i am only a contract employee
my thoughts mean nothing
these people are not my friends, only my clients
the goal: keep them happy
even if they are idiots
such is the game of employment
i'd love to be working for myself
those credit card applications looking real inviting right now
i can not even pay my bills as it is
but if i got a more powerfull computer....
a video camera
a capture card
some amazing hard drives
i could do my own thing
make videos
start by doing free ones for local bands
make a name for myself
move up from there
and also make some serious photoshop artworks
CMYK 2foot by 3foot posters
a gallery show
but i need the hardware
my poor machine is just maxxed out
gives me fits as it is
that kind of work would kil it
i tell myself it is justifiable to put myself in a world of debt
ahhhhh the money game
such is life

- Friday, June 12, 1998 at 15:33:50 (EDT)
Andrea was extra stunning, and nice
then a big suprise, Jeff came up to goff out!
i hugged him and got all giddy
man i luv that guy
twas a good eve, even got to dance my ass off to some skinny puppy!
but bad things going down in NYC
a friend needs a friend
trying my damndest to figure out how to do that
but it's sooooooo late
i'm sooooo tired

- Friday, June 12, 1998 at 03:49:12 (EDT)
Zach (aka Sorted) is by far one my favorite net friends
go visit his new friends
and be nice to them because i want them to take care of him out there in San Fran

- Friday, June 12, 1998 at 03:44:05 (EDT)
guess Hera Aine knows i don't have an mp3 player now.....
- Thursday, June 11, 1998 at 14:18:20 (EDT)
sell your soul
for a canvas to paint on
habitual decay
body and mind taken away
used up by so many hyper-active twitches
deleted from memory in an hours time
well met
well forgotten

- Thursday, June 11, 1998 at 12:58:48 (EDT)
Do you get it?

- Thursday, June 11, 1998 at 02:27:40 (EDT)